5 Lessons Learned from Cocoon

5 Lessons Learned from Cocoon:

1. Old people are feisty – They get uproarious and passionate about things, and not just a lack of 4 pm supper options. Also they curse, want to have adventures involving trespassing and sneaky swimming in abandoned pools, and they talk about farting, boners and ball sacks.

2. Old people are selfish – Aliens be damned! They don’t care if swimming in a pool for the restoration of their fleeting youth at the good graces of a couple kindly aliens sucks the life blood out of 10,000 year old space travelers. When the time comes to ditch this world for the next they are willing to do it at the expense of anyone who gets in there way. Earthlings be damned!

3. Aliens are not all bad – It could be the rest of our video collection talking, but we were shocked to discover not all aliens want to destroy, dismember, melt faces, kidnap hicks for scientific research purposes, and/or obliterate civilizations. Some will, for absolutely no reason, save a group of good-for-nothing old timers from certain death, even though they have done nothing but contribute to a pain in their glowing asses for the last 90 minutes.

4. Yelling “Fountain of Youth” in a crowded old-folks home is akin to yelling “Fire” in a movie theatre. And we now know this from our own experience (both instances)

5. Old people still "do it" – And talk about doing it. And apparently want to do it with other old people. Also see # 1.

Who knew?!